I went downtown to the newest mall built in Guatemala: Miraflores -- yet another example of a design that'd make anyone with any amount of architectural sense sick. Built by the bright people over at spectrum.com.gt. At any rate, being somewhat bored, I decided to watch a movie. The theatres in the new mall aren't that bad.

As I walk into the mall, I see a very interesting sign: No pets, guns, cameras or video cameras allowed. While I can understand the first two items (although, seeing a rabid Akita hunting people in a Gap would be amusing), what crackhead came up with the new [video] camera idea?

At the information desk, I verified that indeed, they did mean no cameras allowed. What possible premise? Security. Apparently taking photographs of public places is somehow a threat. So I pushed a bit more... “How exactly does this improve our security?” “Um... hmm... uh, I think there was a problem at another mall, so they're just doing it in case.” In other words: “no freaking clue”. I also asked if they check people for cell phones, since you could have a camera phone and covertly take pictures. She assured me they'd find people doing that and confiscate their phones.

Later on I find out that the cinema has a $500 reward (which is probably 2x the monthly salary of the people working at the cinema), for finding anyone recording the movies. At the beginning of movies, they play a stupid commercial about not to pirate movies, and compare it to stealing a car (again showing how spaced out the MPAA is). They actually have people with night-vision scoping the audience out during the entire showing.

Now, I'm aware that they do this in the states. The stupid part is that in the USA, movies come out before you can buy them on DVD, download DVD-rips (ok, not always), or rent them at your local movie rental store. Not so in Guatemala. The movie industry is quite backwards, and releases shows much later in different parts of the world (hence their retarded DVD region coding crap). Well, by the time a movie hits Guatemalan theatres *there is no market for screeners of that movie*!

I selected one movie to watch, but my sister told me they had rented it two weeks ago. Others I had seen in theatres in the USA or downloaded DVD-rips of months ago. Some were even at Blockbuster, less than 1km away. All of them are readily available by street vendors (in your choice of VCD or DVD). Yet they still find it necessary to go to extra lengths and “prohibit” cameras to stop this huge screener racket. Silliness. I'm sad to think that some of the population here might A) actually believe them B) not be offended that a company tries to take away their freedom to carry a camera around.

In the sake of prosperity for the country, I'm planning some fun with these people:
1: Photograph and chart the entire mall.
2: Post pictures and schematics here. [For added bonus, mark up the schematics with writing in a script they don't understand.]
3: Distribute flyers at the mall with a URL; email Spectrum.
4: Enjoy the response.
And:
1: Get some empty rolls of toilet paper or other cardboard items.
2: Add a red LED to these items.
3: Distribute at the theatre.
4: Watch employees go nutty thinking they're going to get $50,000 in reward money.
5: Have even more fun when I refuse to surrender my cardboard box.

Just need to find the time...